Parenting Blog

Toddler aggression is not an uncommon observation. Some children, mostly those at the age of around one and a half year, show unusually aggressive behavior like kicking, hitting, biting, and pushing etc. This brings embarrassment to their parents and guardians since these children are rarely welcome at playgroups or at the neighbor’s. It is important to remember that such exhibits of temper are not the child’s deliberate effort to irritate the elders. The child is just expressing him/herself in a way of whose moral impact he/she does not know. Therefore, it is wrong for parents to show anger or irritation by verbally or physically punishing the kid. Following are some guidelines on handling aggressive behavior when the child strikes out.

• Intervene as soon as possible.
• Don’t take sides. Console the child who has been hurt.
• Take the aggressive child aside and tell him/her, ‘I understand you are angry but hurting someone is not allowed.’
• Each time the child goes astray during play, stop the game or take a time-out. This makes the child feel that what he/she did is not welcome.
• If you feel that a certain activity, that requires sharing, repeatedly causes aggression in your child, try to get him/her involved in activity that does not require much sharing, e.g. painting or filling colors in a drawing. But remember not to isolate the child from others. Allow such independent activity to go in groups.
• Praise and reward the child’s good behavior.
• Never hit your child while purporting to discourage aggressiveness in him/her. Punishing or getting too hard on the kid just reinforces the thought that hurting solves problems.